We Found Love

Prologue: We Found Love

Under the starless murky night sky, lay two figures side to side with their back against the green soft verdure. Pair of eyes glared toward the azure, yearning for light to shine upon and blare across the endless horizon. Light breeze swept many golden brown leaves of autumn, shuffled as they hit the ground, only to be blown away by swirls of autumnal equinox. Crickets discreetly chirped from God knows where, as if they were humming along to the sounds of rustling blades of trees. As they danced gracefully with the wind, swirling here and there across the vast green shades of land; Taeyeon and Jessica remained motionless.

Hands clasped together, fingers intertwined perfectly between the spaces and nothing else in the world could possibly be any stronger than their bond. Their skins collided and it was enough to keep them warm from the obnoxious nature of autumn. Their minds were at ease, souls were as calm as the mild tidal waves of summer; tranquility at its' peak and they wouldn't trade this moment for anything else.

"Thank you," Jessica whispered, finally taking her eyes off the horizon. "For everything."

A voice that one could've mistaken for the sounds of heaven; so soft and soothing, peaceful and loving. Her voice allured Taeyeon to pull her gaze onto her. She was greeted by the compassionate smile Jessica beamed and my God did she look breathtaking. Even underneath the gloomy sky, Jessica shone, illuminating up to the starless night.

"Must you smile so sweetly?"

Life, was a cruel and merciless form of invisible torture. It purposely attached us to strings and obligately be its puppets. Tricks, foul plays, sacrifices - Taeyeon thought the world was just a piece of board game, or maybe a game of chess. She despised life's ways of playing tricks on her. Oh how agonizingly brutal life was when it decided to leave her heart desperately broken.

"Yes. To keep that sadness upon you away. Smile, 'cause it's the most beautiful thing a person could ever ask for."

"Funny how it should be me who's supposed to say such thing."

Her views changed when life altered her path to a crossroad where she had the honor to finally have Jessica in her arms. Love wasn't necessarily on top of Taeyeon's priority list, but as life to obnoxiously pull some conspiracies, the girl fell hard toward Jessica but was awfully restrained.

"Would you ever let me go?"

"Not when you're still  you even in another life time."

If life permits, Taeyeon would want this moment to last. Jung Jessica made life worth living for. Jung Jessica, the girl who looked like a broken piece of vintage doll had turned Taeyeon's world upside down. Jung Jessica affected Taeyeon in the most unpredictable ways she could have never imagined.

"I love you."

If You Let Me Try
She rolled flat on her stomach, grunting. Head buried on the pillow, she mumbled incoherent words. She rolled again and let her eyes gazed on the white and void ceiling. She heaved a heavy sigh and lazily opened her eyes. Bringing her hands up, she stretched her fingers, trying to veil the light. She squinted her eyes as some rays radiated through between her delicate fingers. Thoughts endlessly roamed around her obscured and hazy mind, Which way to go? Left, or right? Should she follow her heart, or her mind? Things weren’t supposed to end this way – things weren’t supposed to be as complicated as a never ending labyrinth. Tiffany was standing in the line on how much more she could take.

Life was ideally perfect – she was that Korea’s well known artist who’s loved by the nation, a guaranteed successful future, being a gorgeous woman that every guys wanted and women envied – Tiffany was living in a life full of luxury.

But everyone knew life wasn’t all sugars and rainbows.

She shifted to her right, eyes darted to the picture frame beside her bed. She reached for it and eyes straightly landed on one particular figure. Her lips involuntarily curved upwards and she felt nostalgic. The feeling was warm, warm enough to make her felt cozy inside the ice cold room. The picture showed nine giddy girls having the time of their lives on the beach. One girl, in particular, made a retarded looking face while others had their pretty faces and poses plastered on the photo. A sigh escaped through lips, how she wished life was all glee and how she wished a part of her life wasn’t this much of a labyrinth. How she wished she could just rewind the time and make everything much better.

Tiffany had been going to the right, following her mind. Not following her heart, she knew best that she wouldn’t get hurt and would be able to avoid any heart breaks, but taking the right way didn’t make her entirely happy either. Her lies she conveyed and act she portrayed to a certain someone did break her heart, but more tragically, it broke her heart the most.

It hurts way more to see and to realize that you’re hurting that someone you love the most.



Jessica sat silently, engrossed staring at the sleeping figure on her lap. She couldn’t help but to smile. So innocent, so childlike, so… pure. She stroke her head gently, brushing the hairs covering her baby like face. The softness of Taeyeon’s skin tingled her. Her tiny nose, her brown short hair, her thin lips – they were flawless.

“I can stare at you forever.”

“You know it’s impolite to stare at someone. Moreover – forever.”

“It doesn’t hurt to be impolite.” Jessica softly chuckled. “How long have you been awake?

“Long enough to feel you messing with my hair?” the elder girl closed her eyes, smiling. Once again, Jessica was left mesmerized by the girl on her laps. She wanted Taeyeon and needed to protect her. Deep down, Jessica had completely decided she would never leave Taeyeon’s side. She’d always be there to lend her shoulders whenever the leader needed them. Despite the bittersweet fact Taeyeon was slowly giving Jessica’s a chance, Jessica was contented enough. She couldn’t ask for more. The pain was awfully sweet.

“I trace my fingers in patterns along your skin and if ever there was a moment to be able freeze time, God this would be it.” Jessica whispered softly, eyes never leaving her one and only life. “I love you to the moon and back.”

Those words, those deep earnest words crawled to Taeyeon’s ears just like a song. Every word that slipped between Jessica lips, somehow scarred her. Just like a scar, she would never forget. It’s a scar to remind her how much Jessica had sacrifice for nearly more than six years, having to cope up with the sight she saw every time Tiffany was around. It pained Taeyeon to know that Jessica had been in pain ever since. Although unlike her, Jessica had no one. She had to façade her sadness with a smile. Taeyeon knew better how it actually feels like. Remembering how it hurt Jessica, a lone tear rolled down her cheek. “Taengoo?”

“Why?” Taeyeon sobbed, trying hard to stop the overflowing fresh tears streaming down her cheeks. Jessica felt the warm sensation on her thighs and realized her leader was crying. Oh so badly she wanted Taeyeon to face her right now and just console the crying girl, but Jessica knew her inside and out. Taeyeon hated crying in front of people. She thought it was embarrassing and so instead, Jessica smiled warmly while her hand gently caressed Taeyeon’s head, index tucking the strands of hair behind her ear.

“People fall in love not knowing why or how. It’s a very special feeling that doesn’t require any answer. You just love no matter how stupid you become. But no regrets. Sure I was hurt, but that’s just a part of being in love with someone. Life is never perfect, and so does love. You were everything bad for me, make no apologies.” Jessica could feel Taeyeon stiffened so she kept on stroking the latter’s head. “I’m crushed black and blue but you know I’d do it all again for you.”


The brunette stuck her tongue out and made faces at the elder girl. “Whatever. I love you, and that is what matters the most.”

Taeyeon slowly got up still not facing the younger girl. Hands reached her soaked cheeks and wiped them with the sleeves of her shirt. “I know the fact that you loving me is what matters the most. But Jessica,” she sigh and took a deep breath before slowly turning around to see the brunette. Eyes slowly connecting with hers and Taeyeon couldn’t help but to feel the warmth it emitted. “Those eyes that streamed tears endlessly, it was because of me” Taeyeon whispered, one hand brought up and touched the younger girl’s cheek with much gentleness. “I’m sorry, Jessica. For being such a fool, for hurting you, for letting you suffer that much. I’m sorry for being an ass.”

The brunette closed her eyes, feeling the softness of the hand of her one and only love. Her hand traced upward and cupped it, pressing toward her cheeks. Jessica loved the feeling, it soothed her. The two sat in silence, Taeyeon watched Jessica and seeing her in that kind of peaceful state, made her relieved. It stopped when Taeyeon thought guilt would forever consume her. Jessica was right, ‘love’ is the only thing she needed to believe. ‘Love’ is the only thing that they need to believe in. “I love you, Jessica. I know I can’t promise you anything and you’re right, you do deserve a chance. Not only you, but me too. I’ll love you. I can’t promise you a perfect happiness, but I’ll strive to achieve that for you.”

What’s done was done, Taeyeon realized there was no need to sulk and remorse about the past. She had set her priorities, and they were the present and the future. She vowed she would never ever hurt Jessica because she had enough and she didn’t deserve all the pain. A smile graced across her pale face when she felt a pair of moist flesh on her palm. “Tell me what should I do for a start?”

“For a start, you can start calling me ‘Sica’. I miss that.”


Hummingbird Heartbeat

Ghost of the Past

“Amber,” the brunette with an obvious pair of swollen eyes and a vague smile called. “It’s been a while.” The aforementioned girl walked with much guilt toward the older one with head down, seeing the owner of the voice would only bring back the immense feelings she thought she had before and certainly, Amber didn’t want that. “How have you been doing?”

“Just fine,” lied Amber. Of course she’s not fine. She wasn’t one of those coldhearted people who would just ignore wrenching heartbreaks just like that. Especially not to someone who’s just as important to her. “What about you? Congratulations on your comeback. It’s really awesome, Jessica.”

Jessica forced a smile, her stare pierced Amber’s but it was hollow and the latter noticed. “Thanks.” The two stood there face two face, little did they know that both were slowly getting immersed with their past. Couldn’t take the pain, Jessica averted the situation by breaking the silence, her voice was slowly breaking. “How are you...with Min?”

Ears perked up almost immediately, head snapped and her eyes landed on Jessica’s. “We’re doing good, I guess.” She scratched her head involuntarily, and instantly cursed herself mentally for being so blunt about it when she saw the shorter girl in front of her tensed. “Jessica, I’m so - ”

“I need to go now,” Jessica quickly cut in and turned her back, hoping to suppress the tears that were urging to stream down her cheeks. “I have a recording to do. Bye.” She then reluctantly dragged her feet away from her heartbreaker but stopped after a few steps. The feeling of hatred and disappointment burst inside of her. Oh so badly she wanted to turn around and slap her, but something stopped her from doing so.


“Amber,” She softly whispered but loud enough to catch the boyish girl’s attention. “Please don’t toy her heart like the way you played with mine.”

I hate that you seem perfectly fine without me.

[TEASER] The A Team
There she was, sitting in front of that murky and dingy pub with legs brought up to her chest, giving herself warmth. Her seemingly brown and messy locks cascaded her face, barefooted and a stained white dress – a shipwreck, I would say. The neon lights flickered, revealing shades of her lonesome figure. My eyes gleamed as she tilted her head upwards. She exhaled as smoke came out from her mouth. Her white lips curved into a bittersweet smile as she reached her hand outwards and let the lone drop of snow fell and melted. It was the first snow and she was breathing snowflakes.
The light’s gone, day was ending. The piercing cold was too much. I felt my lungs burning as I inhaled the bitter air. I stood across the street, watching the sole figure daydreaming. Was her lungs burning like mine? I argued with myself. I pulled out a cigarette and struggled to light it up. One flick, two flicks, three flicks. “Darn it.” Then it lit.
The feeling was cozy. The intermingled smell of nicotine and tartar clobbered my nostrils. It made the fire on my lungs to die down. I huffed the tobacco smoke slowly, enjoying the utmost taste of it before leaving my mouth. It blurred my vision almost immediately. Lifting my eyes slowly, I saw the lone one, facing me. In the midst of grey dispersing, she smiled with the most sorrowful smile I’ve ever seen. A smile that would forever be engraved on my mind. In that split second, our gazes were glued.
My eyes grew wide and I choked on my own smoke. “Shit.”  I hawked a few times, and as I peeped what’s in front of me, she vanished.
The angel flew away.


A teaser to my (uber) long TaengSic oneshot! Tell me what you think. Feedbacks, comments, and inputs are always welcome.

Better That We Break
Better That We Break
“Maybe it’s better off this way, it’s better that we break.”

Finger strumming her knees; biting her bottom lip in hopes to suppress her anxiety. Why was she anxious though? The drone like noises and continuous chatter filled the room and ran through her ears, but those weren't the things she wanted to hear. She jolted up from her seat, and walked around the room back and forth. The clock's ticking and it annoyed her. "Jessica we're not done with your hair yet!" Ignoring the shouting, she continued to march out of the room, feeling as agitated as she had ever been. Jessica needed to see her now. Not later, but now, this instant.
Her wish was granted, revealing her dream as she opened the door. Shocked, she couldn't move an inch. It took her exactly 1.2578 seconds to notice the one she longed to see was in front of her. Mouth struggled to open and just converse when Jessica felt her piercing stare was directed to her flabbergasted self. Inside, she was shouting, yelling and screaming 'hello', but none escaped her lips.
"Can you move?"
Pangs struck her ferociously at the figure's bitter and cold tone. Lips quivered, Jessica moved to the side letting the shorter one pass through with a light shove on her left shoulder. But the light push felt like she had been bulldozed by some trucks. It hurt her, mentally. Oh so badly Jessica wanted to cry and let the tears flow in agony. Just maybe, by then, the pain could go away. Who was she kidding though? Jessica herself knew no matter how many tears were shed, the torment, the regret, the pain, would still be there; inside of her, eating her alive. She walked out of the crowded room, head hung low, and headed to the restroom. She thanked the heavens when there was no one around. Slamming the cubicle's door, Jessica immediately broke down, on her knees, wailing.
It was uncontrollable. The tears wouldn't stop and it had always been like this. She would choke on her tears and as ridiculous it might sound, she had once wished she'd die from her own tears. Jessica was just that depressed that she was on the verge of going numb. Hands covered her stained face, back leaned on the cubicle's wall, mind wandered nowhere. Though in the end, her mind would always go back to her devastating past. The unforgivable act and regret; how she wished she had a time machine right now. While crying her lungs out, Jessica's always haunted with one question on her mind; why did I end everything that we had?
"Jessie?" A voice broke out of nowhere. "Jessie where are you? Hey, c'mon come out now. We still need finish hair and make up." The voice's heels clicked, approaching where Jessica was hiding. Jessica pleaded to be alone, but she knew it was no use begging to this friend of hers, she's the persistent one and somehow, sometimes, she wished that her friend would just leave her all alone. "Jessie, please come out."
Standing up, Jessica dusted her shorts and grabbed some tissue paper; wiping the eerie stains of tears away from her. Inhale, exhale. She unlocked the door and stepped outside, forcing a crooked smile as she faced her friend. "Jessie..." A pair of arms snaked around her neck, holding her tight, stopping her from breaking to pieces. None of them said a word, Jessica gave in and hugged her best friend back. It soothed her; the warmth eased her and it did stop her from falling to a deeper pit of misery. The two best friends had a special bond; much like twins, they need not to say a word to understand each other's situations and problems. Though sometimes she would get on Jessica's nerves, Jessica was grateful enough. A best friend was just all she needed right now.
"It's okay, Tiff. I'm okay."
"Jess, give it some time. She'll get over it and you two can fix things up."
Jessica let go of the hug and pulled away. She scoffed as she looked away. "It's been two years, Tiff. I don't think she will get over it and I don't think she's able to forgive me." A bittersweet smile spread across her face and Tiffany noticed the solemn expression and sighed. Jessica placed her hands beside the edges of the sink and hung her head low. "I regret everything." she whispered, almost inaudible, but enough for Tiffany to hear.
"Why did you even break up with her?"
The street was crowded with numerous people and vans lining up. One by one, artists came out and walked in the red carpet, stopped and posed for their pictures to be taken by the press. Squeals and fan chants could be heard all over the area, even inside the vans. Jessica sighed silently, looking by the window at the pulsating throng and the nonstop flickering flashlights. "Okay girls, you can go out now." Jessica heaved another sigh, she was tired. Exhausted faking a smile here and there as if her life was full of sugars and rainbows, but no one but herself knew what's real. She stepped out, with the other members following suit. An enticing smile was plastered on her face, making the wild fans ranging from men to women shrieked in utter admiration and amazement. Inside, Jessica was about to cry.
The person she wanted was somewhere behind here, walking in the same lane. Oh so badly she wanted to turned her head and just take a look of the person, but she couldn't. They stopped in front of a wall full of sponsors, waving hello to the crowd of reporters and photographers. In the corner of her eye, she noticed she had the opportunity that their leader would stand by beside her. The latter glanced at Jessica, making her knees weak. Just a simple and subtle glance could make her like this, she was that influential to Jessica. To her dismay, the shorter lad gestured Tiffany to walk ahead, placing her in between. Of course, Tiffany wasn't dense, she knew the leader's intention, and yet she had to comply. Jessica wanted to break down and cry, again. She knew she couldn't and she had learned how to just momentarily hold it in. And so she did. She continued to wave hello and bowed when they introduced themselves. It wasn't even their performance yet, but Jessica was already exasperated.
The girls looked around for a while, hands wobbling to their fans, smiling to their screaming. Jessica glanced to her right and she noticed there were strands of Tiffany's jet-black hair caught glued on her bottom lip. Being attentive as she was, Jessica shot her hand up and swept away the hair. Right at that instant, the girl on Tiffany's left was too looking at her and both her and Jessica stared momentarily. Jessica flinched at her cold glare before turning away. "Are you okay, Jess?" Tiffany asked. Jessica could only nod, shaking her hand; telling her that she was okay.
She lied.
She was not okay. How could she be okay after their leader, her love, Kim Taeyeon, gave her that revolting, repulsing and disgusted look on her face? Behind that mesmerizing smile, Jessica wished nothing but to end her life.
"Jessie..." Tiffany called from behind. Jessica wished Tiffany would leave her alone, for now, not after she saw Taeyeon showering her best friend with her utmost attention. She continued to walk to their waiting room, acting and pretending she didn't hear and know anything. "Jessie! Will you stop and listen to me!" Tiffany frustratedly yelled. She flinched at her best friend's change of tone that she had to stop. A hand on her shoulder forced her to turn around, revealing Jessica with her pristine eyes, tears were on the verge of falling. Tiffany sighed, "Jessie, you need to tell her."
"Tell her what, Tiff!? And how can I even talk to her when she doesn't even want to talk to me!"
"Then tell me! Just tell me why you dumped her just like that in the first place? It's been two years, Jessie. And I still don't know why you guys broke up. Taeyeon doesn't want to talk about it and I didn't push her even further because I know she'll fall back to depression again. But you?" She ranted, sighing for the second time before continuing. Jessica could only listen as she held her tears in. "You're my best friend and you have never talked about it. You used to tell me everything, but not this. I thought you really didn't want to talk about it because maybe you just want to get over it. But clearly I was wrong. It's eating you alive, Jess. You need to tell someone about it. Talk to me."
"But I did talk to you." Jessica muttered between her sobs. "You've helped me, a lot and you're still helping me - "
"By taking care of Taeyeon? By making Taeyeon fall in love with me? Bullshit!" The duo was using English by now and luckily, there were no passerby around to hear Tiffany's loud yelling. "Why are you doing this to yourself?"
"Shut up, Tiff. Shouldn't you be happy now that you have Taeyeon's full attention? I know you've always liked her, heck, I think you love her!" Jessica backed away, jeering at her friend. She slithered her fingers to her brown locks, groping them to its' roots. She gritted her teeth, she was losing it.
"W - what are you talking about?" Tiffany stuttered.
"Don't play dumb, Tiff. I've always knew you love her, now I don't know what made you back down but I knew for sure you still have feelings for her. Now that we've broken up, and plus, the fact that she hates me right now, you should at least be thankful to me!"
All those rants Jessica was blabbering about, left Tiffany speechless. She didn't completely understand what it was all about, but being a sensitive self-centered person Tiffany was, she couldn't help but to feel she was a part of her best friend's break up. It shocked her too knowing her best friend knew about her secret feelings toward Jessica's ex. "Are you saying I'm the reason why you two broke up?"
"Fuck! No! God damn it, no!" Jessica was enraged. She gritted her teeth so hard, panting heavily. "Tiff! I broke up with her because - because..." She stammered getting the words out. Why was it so hard for her to tell her own best friend the real reason why? Now that she thought about it, it was a pretty - no, a really stupid reason. Jessica blinked twice, all of her expression fell flat. "Because nothing lasts forever." A sense of reality hit her hard.
"Girls hurry up, we're up in 15."
Tiffany nodded toward the direction of the voice. Her gaze was back to the sniffling brunette, pity was what she felt. Shooting her hands up to Jessica's cheeks and cupped them, eyes filled with sincerity. "Jessie, no matter how much you force me, or force her, you can't make her fall in love with me. Her heart's already belong to someone."
The brunette looked up to her, confused. Someone? She thought. "Her heart belongs to none other than the person who broke it in the first place."
Nine girls had finished their performance professionally without a flaw. Artists gathered together during the ending as the colorful confetti trickled down from the ceiling, with laughters enveloping them. Amidst the blasting music and euphoric scene, Jessica beamed her brightest smile and laughed when her members joked around her. Seohyun, the youngest out of all nine, jumped in ecstasy and hugged her when she spotted the brunette fiddling with the confetti that fell on top of her head. Jessica smiled at the  contact and returned the hug. Across where she stood, her eyes darted to the girl with highlighted ends at the tip of her hair. It was Taeyeon. They were both in the same group, living in the same dorm, practice in the same studio, but all those meant nothing and was the total opposite of what she felt.
Why are we so distant? It feels so close, yet so far away.
After all the commotion, all nine girls headed back to their dorm. The ride home was agonizing for Jessica. Seeing her broken love laughing away with the others, as if there was nothing going on between them. Taeyeon didn't even give Jessica a look nor asking her to join in the conversation. Why are you so cold to me? She thought out loud, loud enough for the others to hear; interrupting their conversation. "You say something, Sica?" Startled, she shook her head vigorously; oblivious of a pair of a lone eyes watching her silently.
It was dark, the creamy disc was clouded, nothing shone except for the dimly lit streetlights. Going back to the dorm, being under the same roof with her past (and possibly, last) love would only devastate her even more. She wanted, and needed to be alone. Just for now. "I'm gonna go out for a walk."
Everyone stopped their tracks except for the tallest who were already inside their door. "Sica, it's like 10PM."
"It's just for a while. I'm gonna buy some ice creams too." Jessica said, eyes gazing over Taeyeon's. Jessica knew how much the kid leader loved ice creams and little did Taeyeon know that Jessica was the one who kept track on the ice creams on the fridge. "We ran out of stock." She stiffed a laugh before vanishing to the darkness. The others shrugged and went inside, except for two. Taeyeon stood there, eyes never leaving the figure disappearing before her.
She reluctantly pulled her head and locked her gaze with the raven haired girl's stare. "Let's go inside, yeah?"
"Go after her."
But Taeyeon didn't listen to her. She kept on walking, tugging Tiffany's hand and intertwined it with hers. "It's really late now, Fany. We should get some rest."
"No!" Tiffany rampaged, yanking her hand away from Taeyeon's. "Enough of this! I can't take it anymore, Tae!"
"What do you mean?"
"You and Jessica! Stop lying to yourself!" She stomped. Tears were slowly forming in the corner of her eyes, but she wasn't going to stop. "She loves you, and you obviously still love her!" Taeyeon tried to retaliate but soon was cut off with a finger in front of her face. "Stop. Don't you even dare denying." Tiffany gritted her teeth, suppressing her entire mixed emotions. "You said you love me, maybe you do, but you can never love me the way you loved her, Taeyeon. She's your everything, I know that and you yourself knows that!"
"She broke me, Tiffany."
"Yes she did, Taeyeon. Yes she did. But have you talked to her since she dumped you? Did she even ask for her the truth? Did you?"
She kept her mum. Of course she didn't. The moment Jessica wanted to end their relationship, she gave no definite reason. "I had enough. I think it's better that we break up." was her last words to their commitment. Engulfed with hatred and confusion, Taeyeon couldn't even think or talk things through. She was left confused, alone, and loveless. Indulged with wrath and spitefulness, she couldn't even stand looking at Jessica. Her resent grew even more when the news revealed Jessica and Taecyeon were 'dating', as the public assumed. Even if it was untrue, somehow the truth was unable to reach Taeyeon. Since then on, Taeyeon had never paid heed to Jessica. From that day onwards, she had decided she and Jessica were mere workmates and nothing more, not even a friend.
"Just go. Ask her the truth. Ask her why she broke up with you. Maybe you can't forgive her or accept her back into your life, but you should at least give her the chance to explain and you yourself deserve to know what's the truth." Tiffany wailed and turned her back away from Taeyeon. She couldn't look at her in the face, not in tears, especially not with a broken heart. Though it hurt, Tiffany was willing to let go. She had learned to let go, and move on. As she dragged her feet toward the stairs, a pair of arms snaked from behind and wrapped tightly around her waist. She was surely going to miss the warmth.
"Thank you. Thank you for being there for me, thank you for keeping me sane, protecting me and most importantly," Tiffany's heart was cracking with each words that slipped through Taeyeon's lips. It shattered even more when she felt the grip around her waist tightened, as if she wasn't to let go "thank you for loving me."
And so that night, Tiffany cried a river.
Feet kept pedaling in full speed, dashing here and there with her lungs burning. She was running out of breath, but she wouldn't stop until she found her. This was it, this was the time for herself to ask, and listen. Seeking the truth that was masked for nearly more than two years. Questions roamed and assaulted her obscured mind with tons of possibilities. Maybe Jessica was bored with her, or maybe Jessica had already loved someone else.
She stopped, hands on her knees, catching her breath. She reached the supermarket but it was already closed. "Damn it. Where are you Sica?" Struggling to run, Taeyeon stumbled upon a pebble, causing her to lose balance and fell, scrapping her knees. Blood was evident, her knees were wounded and she hissed as the pain stung through her body. Dusting her wounded knees, she continued running. The pain was bearable, even though her petite body said otherwise.
Under the gloomy velvet sky, a figure across the street caught her attention. Panting, she looked around and realized where she was standing. There she was, standing behind the concrete fences, staring dejectedly to the river. She crossed the streets without waiting for the red light, causing numerous honks of complaint and cuss words here and there. Luckily, with quick reflex, she used her right hand to support her light figure as she jumped when she felt the bumper of a car came in contact with her. "Watch it you moron!" but of course, Taeyeon didn't care less.
"Jessica!" She shouted exasperatedly, still catching her breath.
"Tae - Taeyeon? Oh my God you're bleeding!"
"Why did you break up with me?" Taeyeon asked, stopping Jessica as she kneeled to observe the bloody knees. "Why? Tell me the truth."
"Please, I need to know, Jessica."
Nerves were starting to kick in. The love of her life was standing in front of her, dripping with sweat, eyes demanded an explanation. Did she came all this way to find me? She thought. Taeyeon noticed Jessica's lips quivered; she was scared. It was her first time since the break up that she saw the ice princess shed tears in front of her. After two years, it still pained her. Involuntarily, Taeyeon brought her hands up and cupped Jessica's cheeks, wiping the fresh tears away from her face. She had to do it. She was still in love with her after all.
Jessica's eyes widened at the contact. How she missed this. How she missed Taeyeon's warmth on her. She too, brought her hand up to press Taeyeon's hand on her cheek and lightly snuggled on it. "I didn't mean to. I was scared."
"Scared of what, Jessica? Scared you'd stop loving me?" her words came out soft, but filled with pain and anxiety.
"No!" Jessica shook her head. "I'm scared of the future, Taeyeon. What if we're not meant to be? What if I'm not the one for you? What if... I... I don't know..."
"Jessica..." Taeyeon sighed as she let go of her hands off Jessica's cheeks. "Where's the Jessica I fell in love with? Who doesn't even give a shit about the future and what other people thinks? Where is she?" The brunette could only hung her head low. "I miss her. I wan her back. Jessica, I want you back. I don't know why or how did you get that paranoid attitude."
"You... You want me back?"
"I still love you. After all these years. I was stubborn as hatred got the best of me. I'm sorry I treated you bad. I couldn't deny my own feelings now. Every night and day, I can't stop thinking about you. I cried almost every night, but eventually, I became numb."
Jessica felt her heart stabbed simultaneously. She made the love of her life suffered that much. Jessica detested herself.
"Even when I'm numb, my love for you veiled it all. No matter how hard I try to erase my feelings for you, it keeps on coming back. You hurt me bad, Jessica. But deep down, I just want you to comeback to me." Taeyeon finally said it. All those painful past was thrown away as of right now, Taeyeon needed Jessica and only Jessica. Her heart was finally beating. Fragile and vulnerable, but still beating.
How Jessica just wanted to scream 'yes!' and just pulled the girl to her embrace was tempting, but another thing - person, came across her mind. "But Taeyeon, what about Tiffany?"
"I... Loved her." it hit Jessica hard. "I think, I'm not sure. I'm not sure if it's love, or just a feeling of gratitude. I mean, I do care about her, but... It's different." She groaned, she was unsure of how to put it into words. "I don't know, Jessica. I don't think it's love. Maybe it is, but..." her voice trailed off, Jessica was about to explode. Was Taeyeon having second thoughts? "I can never love her the way I loved you. Because you're the one, Jessica. Only you."
That was all Jessica needed to hear. She cried, cries of relief. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for being so stupid, so foolish and so inconsiderate. I - I'm so sorry. I - I - I love you, Taeyeon!" and she kept on wailing, sobbing, and sniffling. She hiccuped because of her own tears, and Taeyeon smiled at the witty sight. Cute.
Taeyeon walked closer to her, narrowing the space between them. She brought her hands up and pulled Jessica's hoodie up, covering their heads before placing her lips onto Jessica's. Sparks ignited, hearts mended, and feelings became mutual. Under the gleaming street lights, two figures stood there, covered with their hoodies, not wanting to let go, not giving a single care of the world.  "I love you, Taengoo." Jessica whispered.
"You're my life now." the shorter lad replied simply. "I can't promise things won't be broken, but I swear I will never leave."
"I won't, I won't ever leave you again." Jessica said, looking straight to Taeyeon's eyes passionately before locking her lips onto her lover's once again.
"The stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours."


Ease Off The Liquor
Ease Off The Liquor
“Tae – taengoo…” She muttered between the sloppy kisses. Taeyeon wasn’t in the mood to talk, she wanted and she needed actions. Hands trailed Jessica’s waist down to her thighs. Taeyeon thanked whoever invented shorts, because it simply made Taeyeon’s job easier. She groped and caressed her honey thighs as she forced her tongue on Jessica’s mouth to which the poor soul could only obligate willingly. “Taeng… goo…” Soft moans elicited from her mouth. Jessica’s sanity was still there, and she was going to take its’ advantages to the fullest; a rough sex.
Jessica had always imagined and longed for a rough sex with Taeyeon. She could only fantasize, knowing the older girl was as gentle as the summer breeze. She didn’t mind the way Taeyeon’s treating her, heck no one had ever treated Jessica that nicely. Not even boys. Taeyeon was way better than those immature and airheaded boys. Taeyeon was her gentleman. Just once, however, she would like to experience being treated harsh by the leader. She often saw Taeyeon in wrath toward other members, but not to her. When her lover was angered, she couldn’t help herself from getting turned on. Whenever Jessica saw Taeyeon venting her anger through punches on walls and kicking things, she would often lick and bit her lips, in hopes to suppress her lust. Jessica thought it was sexy. She kept it to herself, imagining and fantasizing that Taeyeon would vent those aggressive and brutal actions to her.
The day had finally come and Jessica would not let this day go to waste. “Tae… stop…” She purposely breathed out. Taeyeon ignored her pleads as she let her wet tongue travelled down to Jessica’s smooth bare nape. It gave Jessica the chills. She knew her moans could trigger Taeyeon’s wild side so she purposely stopped herself from moaning. Bringing her one hand up to her mouth, she bit her finger, suppressing all the moans she could.
Taeyeon noticed the harmonious lecherous melody was trailing off. She looked up and saw Jessica biting her one finger in agony. She scoffed before viciously taking of Jessica’s bra off her mounds. Immediately, her lips traveled down to her assets and sucked on her hardened nipples while kneading the other. Jessica couldn’t be any happier. She had been liking her lover’s savage behavior more and more but the way the kid leader was fondling with her breasts now wasn’t helping her to quiet down.
“Moan.” She ordered, but to her dismay Jessica purposely contained her moans eliciting from her mouth. Taeyeon was a bit agitated; she bit hard on her aroused nipple, causing her victim to shriek. Taeyeon smirked smugly. Her hand felt unsatisfied; leaving her breast, her left hand reached down to Jessica’s inner thighs, purposely teasing the younger girl. Taeyeon ears perked up at Jessica’s whimpers. She loved it, it was like a drug to her. She wanted more. Sneakily sliding her hands inside her underwear, Taeyeon laughed wickedly. “You’re flooding.”
“A – ah…” Her prey moaned when Taeyeon’s finger circled around her swollen clit. “M – more…” She begged, but Taeyeon wasn’t planning to comply. She pulled her hand out from Jessica’s panties and brought it up to Jessica’s lips.
“Lick it.” So Jessica did. Hovering above, Taeyeon was really turned on seeing Jessica sticking her tongue out, licking and sucking her finger like a lollipop. “Good girl.” Jessica’s eyes never left Taeyeon’s. Both eyes were filled with immense lust and libido. “Touch yourself.” Taeyeon demanded again and her prey nodded obediently. She thrust her finger inside Jessica’s mouth and smirked when Jessica was thrusting Taeyeon’s finger deeper into her mouth. She could feel her lover’s tongue dancing, swirling around her finger sensually and when she sucked on it, how she wished she was a boy right now. “You don’t need his now do you? My finger is enough to fuck you.”
Taeyeon wasn’t the type to say dirty words whenever they’re having intercourse. This was another side of Taeyeon; the wild type and Jessica loved it. Jessica loved her even more. Sucking on Taeyeon’s finger was new to her and it stimulated even more. How disgusting, she thought, tasting her own juice and loving the rough treatment. The older girl pulled out her finger from her mouth, causing Jessica to whine. Taeyeon smirked. She roughly kneaded Jessica’s assets one last time before forcefully pulled down her soaked underwear.
“Aaah!” Jessica screamed in ecstasy when Taeyeon ferociously licked Jessica’s wet core. Her tongue roamed around her genital senselessly, one hand was back groping and fondling Jessica’s breast, pinching her aroused nipple in between. “Go…d… Tae… Taengoo…” She whimpered, but Taeyeon paid no heed. With two fingers, Taeyeon skillfully spread her walls and let her tongue, curling, coiling inside of Jessica. Having enough of her prey’s breasts, she reached down and instantly thrust two fingers in. Jessica was left screaming.
“F – fuck! No… Taengoo… Ah!” Each thrust, Jessica could feel Taeyeon’s fingers curling inside of her, hitting her sweet spots. “Yes! Right there, baby… Right there!” Jessica was literally asking for more. Taeyeon’s thrusts became rougher and harder as she felt the walls were tightening, she knew her lover was coming but this didn’t mean she should stop fucking her. She let her tongue flicked on Jessica’s swollen clit again and again. As Jessica was nearing, Taeyeon purposely bit it, making Jessica screamed in both ecstasy and pain.
Soon after, Jessica came hard, flooding nonstop over Taeyeon’s face and hands. She didn’t pull back, she lapped on her lover’s sweet love juice. “Oh God…” The dirty slurping sound aroused Jessica and it didn’t help to calm her down when Taeyeon’s tongue was still inside of her. “S – stop… Ahh… Taeyeon, I just came!”

Taeyeon reluctantly pulled back. Only to sweep and carry Jessica to their bedroom. Taeyeon fiercely threw Jessica on the bed; immediately went on top of her and crashed her lips onto Jessica’s. “Mmh…” Her right hand kept Jessica’s wrists above her head. The grip was tight, almost painful – yet Jessica didn’t mind. She liked the pain.
“You’re enjoying this, are you?” Taeyeon asked as she turned Jessica around, her back facing Taeyeon. “You’re wet again.” She said as she kneed down, hands groping Jessica’s ass, opening it a little. Her eyes darted on her lover’s wet entrance, she smiled triumphantly. “Are you actually enjoying your punishment?”
Jessica wasn’t entirely sure how to answer. Of course she was enjoying Taeyeon’s rough action, but the way Taeyeon asked her; was something ambiguous. “Pu – punish me more…” Jessica said, almost begging. With hands supporting her body, she turned her head around, and in the corner of her eye was a bored Taeyeon. “Punish me hard, Taeng – Ah!” A loud slap was heard, cutting Jessica’s pleading. It was Taeyeon’s hand, smacking onto Jessica’s butt. “O – oh my God…” Before the pain could go away, Taeyeon’s tongue was back assaulting her prey’s entrance.
To them, the night was still young. The leader continued her punishment for several hours more and Jessica was happier than ever. Punishments had never felt this blissful.
Rays of light cascading through the windows, trickling down creating organza veiling all over the room. The warmth enveloped two naked sleeping figures wrapped in nothing but a blanket. The morning chipper woke Taeyeon up, rubbing her eye, she felt her head throbbing in pain. When she was about to get up, a pair of arms on her waist stopped her from doing so. She looked to the side; a brunette sleeping soundly. She smiled at the angelic sight. Never had she found someone this dreamy.
“Sometimes I wonder, how are you even real.” Taeyeon whispered to herself. Pulling the strands of her brown hair covering her face, she found reddish blue marks on her neck. She scrunched up her face at the sight. Reaching out, her hand trailed her neck, down to her collarbone; red marks were everywhere. She slid down the blanket and eyes widened in surprised. Bruises all over her lover’s body. “Wha – what the…”
A single throb on her head caused her to hiss in agony. Massaging her temples, sudden images came flashing on her mind. She was the one who made those bruises on the brunette’s body. “Shit.” She cursed. “I’m sorry…” Taeyeon muttered with her utmost sincerity. “I didn’t mean to… I…” She caressed the brunette’s cheek gently, afraid she would hurt her love even more. She kissed her cheeks delicately and hovered above the sleeping figure. “I’m sorry…” She muttered between kisses she planted on the red marks. Every kiss was soft and tender.
The brunette stirred. Slowly opening her eyes, she smiled lovingly at the face above her. “Taengoo…?”
“Sica I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.” Taeyeon said dejectedly. Her heart somehow shattered at the thought how she was possible of hurting Jessica. “Yesterday… Last night… I was – I’m sorry. I really – ” Taeyeon was hushed with Jessica’s pair of lips.
“I love you.” Jessica smiled, cupping the older girl’s face. “Last night was awesome. You didn’t hurt me at all Taengoo.”
“But… these bruises – ”
“It didn’t hurt. Well it did, a little, but I loved it.”
Taeyeon eyed the brunette below her confused. “B – but – ”
“I always fantasized having rough sex with you.” She giggled. “And last night, my dream came true. You should get drunk more often. Or maybe…  I should make you jealous more often.”
“Yah, Sica.” Taeyeon huffed. “It’s not funny. I don’t want to hurt you, seriously. I mean, these bruises…” Taeyeon sighed before continuing, “I don’t even know anymore. You know it’ll be ugly whenever I’m mad or jealous.”
“I know. I know how ugly it is whenever you trash everything out; punching the wall, kicking everything that’s in your way. That’s just your way venting your anger. You know you’ll hurt yourself doing that, and I’m worried.” Jessica ranted with a huff. She sat up straight, pulling the blanket with her and covered her body. “But on the same time… it turns me on.”
“H – huh?”
“How you groan while punching the wall. It sounds so… sexy to me. I wish I was the wall you’re pounding.” Taeyeon’s mouth was left hanging. She wasn’t exactly sure how to reply. “Taengoo-ah, what will you do if I tell you I’m a masochist?”

A/N: omg i'm so sorry if this is a fail smut. To be honest i am not very fond of writing smut, i just can't and don't know how to write it LMAO i'm not making any sense am i? But oh well. This is the continuation from the previous EOTL, since many of you requested a continuation. I didn't plan to make a continuation, but somehow i get the urge to make this part since masochist!Sica is so freaking hot. /drool

Ease Off The Liquor
Ease Off The Liquor

You sabotage the remote with your thumb as you felt agitated with the unentertaining channels. A grunt escape your lips, cursing on the insignificant weather forecast. "Who in the world would watch this stupid channel." You cursed. A click after another, you gave up. Throwing the remote away, you stretched your body. You heaved a defeated sigh and rolled the back of your head, letting your eyes glared on the void ceiling. No one was around, the home was yours yet you missed its' chaotic scenes. 

At the corner of your eye, you spotted your laptop. Lazily, you grabbed and opened it. With a brisk, you surfed through the internet and browsed through some websites. One website caught your attention, one swift quick and it loaded. Your eyes immediately shot open when you saw the headlines. A surge of adrenaline gushed through your veins. You felt your blood boiling, anger was somehow overwhelming you. You balled your fists and gritted your teeth, all to supress your rage. You closed your laptop brutally, got up on your feet and stomped your way to the fridge. You reached for the handle, and savagely opened it. Eyes yearned to find a can of beer, and with a tad bit of relief, you found one.

With a heavy heart, you walked back to the living room and sulked. You opened the lid and immediately down the cold intoxicating concoction in a rush. The intermingled smell of alcohol immediately clobbered your nostrils. You felt your lungs burning, and stomach grumbling in discomfort. You knew you weren't much of a drinker, but you forced yourself in hopes the booze would enlighten your fragmented heart and jealous soul. You brought your knees to your chest, embracing them as if you would fell apart if you didn't. With a can on your hand, you buried your head in your hands. Immense feelings rambled your obscured mind and flashing images of a certain brunette agitated you. Involuntarily, your grip tightened, crushing the helpless aluminium can. You felt an uncontrollable wrath when your displeasing thought continued to the intimidating photo you saw on your laptop. Heart throbbed in pain, consumed in resentment and jealousy.

"It's rare to see you drinking the night away."

A soothing voice travelled through your right ear along with her hot breath. It tickled you and you immediately felt a chill down to your spine. It was such a familiar voice. A voice that would often bring you joy and happiness. But not today. You sat still, unsure of what to do. Spontaneously, you brought the wrinkled can of beer to your mouth, gulping down to the very last drop of the hard stuff.

"What's with you, hm?" A pair of hands snaked around your neck. The trivial contact tingled you. "You seemed so tense." She raked her fingers through your short brown locks, fiddling with them. The fact that she didn't feel the guilt irritated you. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." You answered short. You threw away the now empty can away, and it missed the trash can. You groaned in vexation. A giggle escaped through the brunette's lips. She rested her chin on top of your head,  and muttered "You're lame." You scoffed smugly, and that was all you could do. You were in the midst of battling yourself, should you ask, or kept quiet instead. "What's with you really?"

"I said nothing, okay?" You shoved her hands away and freed yourself from her embrace. "Oh I'm totally fine, Jessica." You stormed your way and picked the can up, and ferociously tossed it to the trash can. Unbelievably, it hit the edge of the trash can and bounced back to the floor. You groaned for the umpteenth times today, and cursed silently under your breath while the brunette could eye you curiously as she took a sit on the sofa. "I'm feeling awesome. Totally fine. Like, totally fine when you hung out with Taecyeon to Starbucks while we're in Japan."

You heard the brunette scoffed, "What is wrong with you?" Her tone was somehow skeptical and you noticed. You were clearly lost on how to reply her, and as your pride got in your way, you shrugged. "So you think i was hanging out with Taecyeon?"

"Oh, right, sorry, my mistake. You guys were dating. Right, right." You muttered, sneering. Bending down, you grabbed the can and stood right beside the trash can. "So how was it? Was it fun dating that monkey-faced gorilla?" In a split second, you realized what you said didn't make any sense at all. You cursed silently at yourself for your failure.

"Kim Taeyeon, are you jealous?" She jeered. She grabbed the cushion and hugged it as she leaned forward. You realized she was eyeing you, mockingly.

You scowled, smugly and rolled your eyes. "Me? Jealous?" You retorted. "Of that Taecyeon?" You taunted. "For what? His looks? His reputation? His body? No. Not at all. There's obviously nothing to be jealous from him. Okay? Get that?" You were in denial and you knew that very well. Yet, ego and pride were winning. For the third time, you smashed the can to the trash can viciously. Due to the force, it bounced out from the trash can and flew away. "Argh!" You yelled at the inanimate objects as you kicked them hard.

"God, you're so sexy when you're mad."

“Stupid ass trash can. Stupid can.” Growling, you raked your fingers through your hair and pulled them in utter frustration. This was clearly not the first time you’ve been jealous. You shook your head in denial, “Tsk, I am not jealous.” That was supposed to stay on your mind, but it slipped through your lips and Jessica heard every single words. Without you knowing, a sly smirk was plastered on her face. You turned around facing the cold wall and leaned your throbbing head against it. Alcohol wasn’t much of a help either, it wasn’t relieving, it did nothing but ignite the fire inside you. “Shit.”
“So you are jealous.” She said. “You know it’s okay to admit – ”
“I am not fucking jealous, okay!” You snapped harshly, glaring at her. Soon, you realized that you went a bit too far. The brunette sitting at the sofa clearly was taken aback by your words and in an instant, you were engulfed with guilt. “So – sorry.” You whispered, eyes looking away. Anger had disappeared, but shame took over. “I’m sorry.”
With your back facing her, you heard her heaving a sigh. Is she mad at me now? Fuck this, I’m such an idiot. You mentally damned yourself for flaring up at her, regretting every single words that came out. Unexpectedly, you felt you were pulled into an embrace. Her contact seemed trivial, but you felt the passion. She snuggled and crooked her head under your neck, and her sweet strawberry and vanilla scent gushed through your nostrils. You were never the person who liked sweets, but she was an exception. “Why are you hugging me.”
“Cos I simply can’t resist you.” She said, sweetly. “I’m sorry.”
You gently pushed her hands away and turned around. “Did you really have a date with him?”
“What if I do?”
The moment she said that, your heart skipped a beat. “I…”
“Punish me.”
You jerked at her sudden sultry and husky voice. “W – what?”. Subconsciously, you backed away. “Why – why in the world should I punish you?”
She leaned closer to you and you gulped the lump formed on your throat. “Because I was with Taecyeon?”
The moment you heard the revolting name, you were awfully perturbed. “So you DID go out with him!” Walking away from her, you kicked the tin container in fury. “The fuck…”
“I didn’t exactly go out with him y’know.” She huffed. “We met along the way, and it just happened that he was going to Starbucks. So I just smiled and said hi to him.” You averted your head away from her, all you wished for right now was not hearing all these bullshits. “What’s wrong with saying hi and smile? I mean he smiled at me so I smiled back? You know he’s not the first guy who ever smiled at me.”
You snapped your head, eyes darted to hers. “No, you don’t get it. The ‘smiling back’ part that kills the fuck out of me.” You spoke in a matter-of-fact tone. “I can tell and I can sense. The fucking monkey is literally hitting on you, okay! So the fact that you smiled back at him would obviously give him the wrong idea.”
“Okay, okay.” She threw her hands up in the air, “I get it. I’m sorry, alright.” Her words seemed sincere, and right away caught you off guard. You dragged your feet and sat on the sofa. You heaved a heavy a sigh and veiled your head with your forearm. Somehow you felt lightheaded, you tried to talk things out nicely, but no matter how you forced the words, you couldn’t seem to do it. In the end, you gave up. “So…”
With eyes closed, you heard clothes shuffled. Shrugging them off, you kept mum. “Punish me, Taengoo.” Ears instantly perked up to the hoarse and sultry voice beside your ear. You jolted from your seat, eyes widened at the half naked brunette who was now straddling you. “What in the world – ” She looked like a mess - hair disheveled, her shirt was unbuttoned and dangled loosely around her arms. Your eyes fell downright to the sight of her assets. “Silly Taengoo.” You heard her giggling, “Are you still alive?”
“B – barely.” You stuttered, “What are you doing? Jesus!”
“Forgive me. Punish me. Do whatever you want with me.” Her hands shot out to you and were wrapped around your neck. Her fragrance was intoxicating you, and you felt you couldn’t cope up with your anger. Your veiling walls were slowly breaking down as her alluring scent kept on assaulting your nostrils. You clenched your fist, stopping yourself to the point they turned as white as a sheet of paper. The effect of alcohol was slowly beginning to consume your consciousness and you cursed it for that. “I’ve been a very bad girl. A very bad, bad girl…”
She kept on purring on your ears and you found yourself getting more and more turned on. It sent chills down to your spine when you felt her warm and moist tongue nibbling on your earlobe. From that instant you knew the beast inside you had taken over your body and soul. “You ask for it, Sica.”
The brunette shrieked when you turned her over, grabbing her wrists above her head. You hovered her and gave her one last smirk before proceeding sabotaging your prey. The night had just begun for the two of them; a night full of torture and agony. But who knew that punishments could be this heavenly?

Straight Hair

"Why are you avoiding me?" a voice ran through my ear. It was all too familiar. I kept my mum and gulped the lump on my throat. I felt taunted at her sultry voice. It had always been like this. I wondered why. This time, however, seemed to be an exception. I couldn't seem to look at her straight in the eyes. Stupid me.

"i'm not." i said, proud as i was able to maintain my cool composure. My eyes gazed at the mirror infront of me. Unfortunately, they landed at the pair of warm melancholic brown orbs which belonged to a certain brunette standing behind of me. My head immediately snapped down, avoiding anymore eye-contact.

"See you're doing it." she sighed.

Involuntarily, i brought my hands up to my chest and pretended buttoning my already buttoned shirt. I knew exactly what she meant, yet unconsciously my mind told me to act clueless. "doing what?"

I felt a hard tug from my shoulders. It was her, turning me around to face her. Suddenly, we were inches a part. I felt her grasp tightened as her sad eyes pierced through mine. What a sad pair of eyes, i thought. I hissed when i felt her nails dug onto my skin. Though somehow it hurt less compared to seeing her sorrowful brown orbs. The thought of me hurting her made me feel ashamed. Ashamed to think that i've somehow, indirectly avoided her for a stupid and ridiculous reason. Then again, i just couldn't help it. I looked away, averting her dejected stare. "That. You're avoiding me. You can't even look at me in the eyes!" she was clearly exasperated. "Did i do something wrong?"

Blobs of tears were visible in the corner of her eyes. Guilt was overwhelming me. "no... You didn't." i whispered.

"Then why?" she sobbed. She released her grip on my shoulders. Funny, i missed the warmth already even if it was such a trivial contact. "Why cant you look at me? Am i that ugly to you?" She muttered between her sobs. I felt my heart being stabbed with numerous daggers. It hurt that much that i couldn't help to pull her in my arms.

"Of course not, dummy!" i snapped. "you... You're nowhere near ugly. You - you're beautiful, you know that?" i could've sworn my cheeks were flushed red. Thank God she couldn't see my embarrassed face. I felt like a burden had been lifted off from my chest. Relieved. Yeah, relieved. I heard her sniffled, it was too adorable that my lips curved to a smile. "i'm not mad at you. I can't never be."

She pulled me in closer as she wrapped her hands around my neck. It made my heart pounding, but it was sensational. I loved it. I loved it whenever we're like this. Having her in my arms, feeling her warmth - She made me feel alive. I loved it too when she fiddled around with my hair. I wished we could stay like this forever. "Me too."


"You wished that we could stay like this forever, am i right?" she giggled.

"How'd you know?" my eyes widened in much surprise. Mouth was left almost hanging.

"Cos i know." she remarks. "You would always say that whenever i stroke your hair. Then afterwards you would hugged me so tight and said those lovely words."

I was touched. She knew me that well. I reluctantly let go of her as i stared at her apologeticly. "I'm sorry, for being a jerk." i sighed. I hold her by the shoulders and saw her looking at me bewilderedly. She kept her mum which i assumed was a sign for me to start explaining. Inhaling, i began talking. "I didn't mean to avoid you. It's just that... When you were done with your hair and make up, i was totally mesmerized." i paused, taking a second to understand her incomprehensible expression. "You... With straight hair. It's just... Too much." i stuttered. "you look amazing with straight hair." i stroke her cheeks as i stared at her passionately, in hopes she would understand. My eyes trailed her godly facial features. From her endearing eyes, to her nose, and to her scrumptious lips. "...not to mention sexy."

I immediately closed my mouth with my both hands after i realized what i just said. "Oh my God i'm sorry! I - i mean - "

"You dummy!!" she snapped, i was left shocked. My eyes widened for the second time when she crushed her lips onto mine. She placed her hands on my cheeks and pulled me in closer. The world seemed to stop for me, it became stagnant. Our lips molded perfectly and it was such a sweet sensation. She backed away slowly, leaning her forehead against mine and stared lovingly. I felt hypnotized. "Dummy..."

"you're avoiding me because i look good with straight hair?"

"we - well... I guess you could put it that way..." i stuttered as i rubbed the back of my head.

"why? I don't get it." she giggled a little. Taking a step back and crossed her arms, she looked at me with an eyebrow raised, waiting for me to answer. I swear she looked amazingly sexy.

"be- because um, i... I don't really know."

"are you scared seeing me like this?" she interrogated. Was it me, or i felt like her tone of voice changed a little.

"Uh, yeah, i guess."

"Scared of what, Taengoo?" She smirked. She tauntingly swayed her ways toward me, slowly, with oh so intimate fashion. We were inches apart, i couldn't help but to feel intimidated. She was like a walking striptease for Pete's sake! "Scared of getting..." She ran her fingers through my short locks, instantly sending me tingly vibes down to my spine. She leaned in closer with eyes never leaving mine "...getting turned on?"

That did it. Her deep husky voice just clicked the 'ON' button in me. I wanted her, and i wanted her now. Yes, Jessica with straight hair was the best thing that could ever happened in my life. She looked beyond sexy with that and i just couldn't control it. I grabbed her by ger slender hips and pulled her closer to me. I assaulted her lips, savoring the taste of her sweet and sensational juicy pink lips. I licked her bottomed lip, forcing an entrance which surorisingly, she wasn't even resisting. Our tongues danced around, roaming each other mouths. I heard her moaned softly. It was music to my ears.

Hunger. I was hungry for her. My lips trailed downwards to her bare and smooth neck. Her luring scent clobbered my nostrils immediately. It was like my oxygen. My tongue swirled around her neck, leaving wet trails of kisses all over. She moaned in pleasure. "Taengoo... We have a concert in 20 minutes." i was surprised she could even talk. I'd have to shut her up.

"i want you." i said as i hungrily looked at her. She seemed to be engulfed with lust too. "I know you want me too. Or else, why did you even have to tease me like that?" my hands went down and stroke her honey thighs slowly. I noticed she bit her lower lips, trying to keep herself from moaning even louder. Too bad it just made me even more turned on. "you want me to stop?" i asked, mockingly. I ran my fingers to her inner thighs and she began trembling. I stroke her moist womanhood gently, and that did her. A shriek escaped through her lips. I smiled thriumphly. "i guess i should stop."

"No! Do - don't. Oh God..." she quivered. She planted kisses around my neck eagerly. She was starving. Her gentle brown orbs were now burning with lust. I couldn't help but to let out a smug chuckle.

"but we have a concert in - "

"Screw concerts!!"


Posted via LiveJournal app for iPad.

Red Shades
Chapter 1 - Predictions.

“Teuk, I need you to make me some school applications and reports.”

The man in front of me lifted his head as he took of his reading glasses. He seemed bewildered. He sighed and leaned back to his chair. “What for?” He questioned.

“I just want to go back to school.”

Scoffing, he retorted. “But you finished school a century ago.” His gaze stuck on mine, I couldn’t help but to gulp. I wasn’t the type of person to lie, but the situation I was in back then made me a bit agitated and… abashed. “What’s wrong?”

I took a sit as I sighed. Massaging my temples, I was clearly speechless as how I would elucidate what my genuine intention was. “I don’t how to put this.” I said with my eyes closed. For once in a life time, I felt lost for words. “Remember Stephanie?”

I noticed him stopped breathing or at least, for a second. The devastated name rang a bell to both of us. I tilted my head only to met his inquiry eyes. “I think I found her.”

“That’s preposterous.” He remarked. “Taeyeon, you do know she’s de – ”

In a lightning speed, I dashed toward him and grabbed him by the neck, lifting him up from his cozy seat. Clenching on his neck vigorously, I was obsessed by anger. “Don’t, say it.” I gritted my teeth as I demanded. “She’s not de – ”

“Stop living in denial!” A vicious force shoved me away. In a flash, all I could feel was him pinning me down to the hard, cold wooden floor. It creaked, but my eyes were focused on his flaring orbs. His hands locked to my wrist tightly to the point his sharp nails dug onto my skin and into my flesh. “She’s dead, Taeyeon. Stephanie’s dead.” His voice softened, and his gripped on both of my hands eased. “You gotta stop living in fantasies and start to accept the reality. It has been over a century, Taeyeon.” I averted my gaze to the side and I found a picture frame over the top shelf. It was her. That black glossy hair, that pair of luscious lips and that endearing eyes. It was you. You looked so beautiful.

“Move on.” He muttered while standing up on his knee. He sighed and went back to his desk. He sighed for the second time as he flopped himself to the chair. I got up, eyes still darted to the old vintage photo frame standing still on top of the ligneous shelf. My feet moved on its own, it had always been like this. You lured me in. I was so into you that my nerves and senses would eventually give in and break down. I was your marionette and you were my master.

Shall I hang on? Or shall I let you go?

Now that you’ve gone, I belong to no one. My strings were cut loose and I became lost. I was in a daze and I couldn’t find myself an escape. Where were you? You’re gone, but there you were, walking down some school’s park with a fake smile plastered on your face.

“You need to stop paying any attention to the people from your past, because there is always a reason why they are not in your future, Taeng.” I glanced at him and our stares were locked. He was serious and he meant it. I gently grab a hold of the old rusty frame, dust were cascading your seraphic face. I gently wiped it off, thumb was on your cheek. I missed the softness of your creamy skin. I missed everything and I missed you.

Was that you, Stephanie?

“You told me to move on. Then I will. Just sign me up to that school.”


“I’m telling you, Tiff! I’m having this… weird flashy images on my head. They were like glimpses of the future or something!”

Rolling her eyes, Tiffany scoffed. “So what? You’re telling me that you’re a psychic now?”

“Well, my grandma said I’m a witch.” She shrugged, hands still on the stirring wheel. “I mean, my late family line did come from some mythical… countries or something. What was that name again – well whatever, you get the point.”

Two girls were on their way back home as they have just finished attending some tedious orientation. Both girls chattered happily, or at least of them were. The short one, Sunny Lee – suddenly brought up the topic of foreseeing and some psychic related stuffs as she had been predicting almost everything since summer started and turned up exactly what she had envisaged. Sunny shared her story with so much enthusiasm while Tiffany was just trying to keep up.

“Okay… then predict something about me.” She challenged.

Sighing, Sunny replied. “I see – Ah!!”

Both girls squealed in panic. A bizarre black object was thrown and clashed on the window savagely. Startled, Sunny swerved the stirring wheel in a flash, letting the car to run loosely and veered in a messy zigzag pattern. Just in time, Sunny quickly stepped on the brakes and stopped the untamed car and brought it to a halt before hitting the concrete block. Both girls were pulled back to their seats by their seatbelts, distressed.

Tiffany’s face turned white pale, eyes widened in shock, fists balled until it turned white. It looked like she didn’t breath at all.

“What was that!?” Mouths left wide open, both girls could finally catch their breaths. “Oh my God. Tiffany, are you okay?”

Finally gaining back her composure, Tiffany inhaled a large amount of air before meeting Sunny’s worried gaze. “It’s okay, I’m fine.”

“It was like a bird or something. It came out of nowhere.”

“Really, I can’t be freaked out by cars for the rest of my life.” Tiffany heaved a sigh and shook her head. Sunny sighed, but this time, in relieve. Summer was over, but Tiffany’s life had just begun. Losing her parents during a car accident had devastated her, leaving her and her brother in a complete, utter mess. She thought life was unfair. When the car swerved savagely, colliding the steel fences and finally dove into the vast ocean, she crashed flung out through the glassy window, leaving her forlorn parents drowning and vanished to the deep blue sea.

It was a cruel and harrowing truth for her to accept. Throughout summer, Tiffany had always been in somber. Sobbing through out the days and nights. Being a fortunate child she was, her auntie found Tiffany and her little sister and took them in. From that moment on, they have been taken care of and found themselves another home.

“I predict that this year is going to be kick-ass.” Tiffany nodded with a smile. “And I predict the sad and dark times are over. And you, are going to be beyond happy.” Sunny ended with a triumphant grin as she held on to Tiffany’s hand.


“Look at this school.” Sunny groaned. “Major lack of male real estate.”

“You complained a lot.”

“Oh c’mon. I can’t live a life alone. I need a man, Tiff.” Tiffany could only roll her eyes and chuckled. Her friend’s eyes darted somewhere else and she noticed. The happy go lucky look on her face vanished and it triggered Tiffany’s curiosity to turn her head to the cause of Sunny’s irksome face.

Tiffany waved awkwardly to the person across the hallway only to get a cold and expressionless face. Tiffany saw him only staring back at her and turned around only to grab his books and walked away. Disappointment was clearly written on her face. “He hates me.” She sighed.

“That’s not ‘hate’. That’s, ‘You dumped me, but I’m too cool to show it… but secretly I’m your biggest stalker ever.’”


A familiar giddy voice was heard. Two girls tilted their heads to the source only to find a tall and slender girl walking hurriedly toward them. “Oh my God.” She exclaimed as she put her arms around Tiffany’s neck and pulled her to a tight embrace. “How are you? Oh it’s so good to see you!” Shocked, Tiffany could only nod. “How is she? Is she good?” The straight haired girl questioned Sunny, releasing Tiffany from her tight hug.

“Seohyun, I’m right here. And I’m fine, thank you.”


“Yes, much better.”

“Oh, you poor thing.” The girl named Seohyun cooed as she pulled the quite vexed Tiffany to another tight, sympathetic hug. “Okay… Seohyun.” Tiffany choked, clearly the hug was too suffocating. Sunny was mischievously (and silently) laughing observing the witty scene.

“Okay, see you guys later?”

“Okay. Yeah.”

“Bye guys!”

They looked at each other, rolling their eyes almost instantly. “No comment. I’m not gonna say anything.” Breaking into laughter, the girls continued to stroll their way to class while Tiffany skeptically shook her head.


“Don’t take more than two in a six-hour window.” Handing a white pill, the girl observed her surroundings before gulping it down her throat. She looked satisfied.

“Hey Krystal.” A hoarse voiced called from the distance. A wavy haired boy arrogantly strode where the two people were standing. “I knew I’d find you here with this crackhead.” He ended with a scoff.

“Hey, Minho.” Krystal pulled the boy’s collar and smacked her lips onto his’. One was watching with aggravation. Looking away, she placed her lit cigarette onto her lips and took a puff.

“I think you should go back home and play with your stuff toys kiddo. These stuffs aint for little kids.” Barked Minho, snaking her arms around Krystal’s slender and tiny waist. The smug look on his face was exasperating.”

“Said the guy who was knocked out with only three glasses of liquor.”

“Watch it – ” Just when the older guy about to retaliate, Krystal stopped him in between. “Hey, take it easy. It’s Tiffany’s little sister.” She kissed him beside his thick lips, trying to cool his temperamental boyfriend down, though Krystal’s gaze never left the high and mighty smoking girl.

“I know who she is. And I don’t care if she’s a girl. I’ll still kick her ass.” Minho eyed the girl dauntingly. He turned around and face his girlfriend, he smiled conceitedly before proceeding their make out session.

The intimidated girl once again trashed the scene as she clicked her tongue. Inhaling another puff from the nicotine filled object, she reluctantly walked away from the heart wrenching sight.


“Hold up. Who’s the hottie?”

“All I see is back.”

“It’s a hot back and I know when I see one.” Tiffany scoffed.

“Your records are incomplete.” They heard the secretary muttered. “You’re missing immunization records, and we do insist on transcripts.” She demanded as she flipped through the stack of papers on her desk.

“Please look again.” An angelic voice escaped through the mysterious person’s lips as she took off her Raybans. “I’m sure everything you need is there.” The secretary locked eyes with the stranger. She could’ve sworn the stranger’s eyes were gold and it was beaming. She kept glaring at the stranger, and somehow she was being lured in – soul was dragged out. She was looked fazed and hypnotized.

“Oh… You’re right.” She retorted, sounded like she was commanded to say so. “So it is.” Carving a smile, she looked up to the stranger and agreed monotonously.

“I’m sensing she’s a bad ass.”

“Since when are you into girls?”

“And I bet she’s into art or maybe singing.”

“You’re really gonna run this psychic thing into the ground, huh?” Tiffany jeered. “Pretty much.” Shrugging, Sunny found her staring at the stranger and couldn’t seem to pull back and stop. Tiffany heaved a heavy sigh hopelessly at her best friend.

Ahead, she saw her younger sister darted to the restroom with head hooded with her sweater. Though it was quite distant, Tiffany could spot the paleness on her younger sister’s creamy face. “I’ll be right back.” She told Sunny before leaving her to the restroom.

“Please turn around.” Sunny mumbled to herself, yearning to see the stranger’s enigmatic face.


Tiffany shoved the door and stomped her way to her sister who was apparently zoning out while looking at the mirror. She yanked her sister’s arm, turning her body to face tempered brunette. Shocked, the kid could only watched her older sister cupped her cheeks before narrowing the gap between them. Tiffany’s eagle eyes scrutinize her baby sister’s face.

“Great. First day of school and you’re already stoned.”

“No I’m not.” She scoffed and looked away.

“Where is it?” Tiffany asked, more like demanding. Though it didn’t do any good on her stone headed sister. “Where is it, Sulli.”

Tiffany could not be any less impatient. She gave herself permission to raked Sulli’s jacket and checked every pockets there were. She bit her lower lip, trying to suppress her anger. “Is it on you?”

“Stop!” Yanking Tiffany’s arms away, Sulli hissed. “You need to chill yourself, alright?”

“Chill myself?” Her older sister mocked. “What is this? A stoner talk? Dude you are so cool.” She added, sarcastically as she continued riffling inside the pockets. Sulli defended by gripping her sister’s arms and tried to push them off. “I don’t have anything on me! Are you crazy?” She yelled.

“You haven’t seen crazy yet, Sulli.” Tiffany barked, glaring at her sister. She remarked with much emphasis on every word. “I gave you a summer pass but I am done watching you, destroying yourself up!” Sulli had enough of this pep talk and she was sick of her sister bugging the hell out of her life. She tried to dash out and walked passed by her sister, only to get a harsh push by her sister. Though smaller in height, Tiffany could be really rough when in temper. “No, you know what? Go ahead, keep it up.” Eyes boiling with anger, the two sisters were engaged in an intense glaring contest. “Just know that I am going to be there to ruin your buzz every time, you got it?”

A sound of the toilet flushing broke their severe tension. The elder backed away, Sulli looked down on her feet, swallowing every words that slipped through her sister’s lips. “Sulli, I know who you are, and it’s not this person.” Shaking her head, Tiffany continued. “So don’t be this person.”

“I don’t need this.” Sulli snapped. Bolting out of the resting room, Tiffany was left baffled and angered. Her baby sister was the only real family she had and she couldn’t afford to lose her. She placed her palms on the edge of the sink with head hung low, closing her eyes, she tried to break free from her obscured mind. Everything was in a mess.


“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Ms. Kim.”

‘Oh, she’s turning around!’ Sunny shrieked silently on her head. The stranger had just finish with her school administration as she was staking up her papers. She turned around, unaware of Sunny’s embarrassing position and continuous admiral stare – and walked away. Sunny’s small eyes seemed big as she failed to take her eyes off the beautiful stranger. She was in stupor when the stranger’s face was revealed. It was beyond flawless. Her reddish brown locks were tied up in a ponytail, exaggerating the outsider’s charismatic face and her deep enticing brown orbs. The black jacket embraced the figure’s curves perfectly and those pearly black piercings stabbed impeccably on her right ear. She seemed small, but her presence blew everyone else’s away as she strode down the hallway. Everyone who passed by her would take a second look, some would continuously stare and some would gasp – stricken by her splendor.

As she was already in front the women’s restroom, another had hurriedly opened the door from the other side. The split second had made them almost bumped with each other and Taeyeon’s quick reflex managed her to take a quick step back. “Sorry.” The brunette looked up to her as she smiled sheepishly. Taeyeon’s eyes widened in surprise. She was completely dazed. The person she almost bumped into was unreal. ‘She couldn’t be.’

“You… Stephanie?”


Red Shades
Red Shades
Prologue - Stephanie.

I've been living secretly in this world for more than a hundred years. Cascading, veiling myself from other mortals, I lived solely. Loneliness was my friend, misery kept me company – they loved me so much. Life had always been the same since the day I became the cold blooded one. Fed on blood, travelling from cities to cities, learning more and more about cultural differences, overcoming language barriers, living the history – I comprehended everything in life. Never in my life I would imagine myself breaking away from this wretched solitude.

Until the day I saw her.

She looked so familiar. The feeling was alien, yet it was homey – as if I had been living with that irksome feeling. Yet I reminded myself that the only ones living with me were misery and loneliness. I briskly jumped to the highest point of the newly renovated building where no one could spot me. I squatted down, wind was slightly gushing onto my face and my gaze fell toward the certain brunette walking along the school gateway with bunch of other people. A twinkle was plastered on her milky smooth face. Happiness was written all over her.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Thank you.”

I heard you, but sorrow was evident in your tone. You were not as happy as you seemed to be. You were lying and I was sure of it. What brought you to this wretchedness? A ravishing beauty like you should not be dwelled in dejection. You walked away from the gate, heading towards some entrance. My feet moved on its own, involuntarily jumped my way to another rooftop so I could observe you more. I saw you giggling, it was the cutest thing I have ever witnessed in my hundred year of living. Though your giggles and laughter might be fake, I sensed that you were trying hard to laugh. Surely your best friend made an effort too. But yes, that was the most darling titter ever.

I paid heed to your every movements. The way you walk, the way your hand gestured as you speak, the way those sparkling and pristine eyes would turn to endearing crescents when you’re smiling. All too similar. Maybe the only difference was your brown long locks, dangling freely over your shoulders. They looked perfect. Yet I felt nostalgic, remembering that somehow it should be black and shoulder length. I shook my head In denial. There was no way.

I heard you screamed. My ears perked up almost immediately. You squealed in fear. My eyes widened, you were afraid – afraid of bugs. I knew someone, that could be so afraid of tiny little insects. That would scream at the top of her lungs, just because she was petrified by them. The way you bawled in fear was precisely the same. Yours were distinct and I knew it from anywhere. You couldn’t be…




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